When we are returning to home , I don't see Dilip. As I moved outside there are lot of houses. It's a large park and there are a lot of people, though, so maybe I'll find him eventually. Mohit and I spend a long time mingling with other people, sharing our situations. It's nice to talk to other people who are going through the same thing. Mohit and I get split up, but I manage to finally find Dilip. "Hey!" he says, "I'm glad you're here!" "Me too," I say. "How are you holding up?" he asks. "Fine, all things considered," I say. "You seem to be taking it well," he says, "You have a very feminine appearance. I mean compared to some of the other women who were once men. You even look more like a woman than I ever did. I always had a butch tomboyish look." "Yeah?" I ask. "Yeah," he says, "I never really liked dresses or makeup." "Well, I've learned that I don't mind them," I say, "In fact, I'm beginning to like them." "Well, you look great," he says. "You too," I say back. "You should stay ," he says. "After verification?" I ask. "Yeah, a bunch of us are gonna stay and really let loose," he says. "Count me in," I say. "Great," he says, "I'm going to talk to some other people, but I'll see you then." "See you then," I say, as he walks over to some other people. I find Mohit and tell her that I'm staying for the after verification. She says if I'm staying she'll stay too. We go back to walking around and mingling with random people, but I find the conversations to be increasingly boring. I would rather have just stayed talking to Dilip. After a while, the verification dies down and a bunch of people filter out. However, there is still a decent amount of us left, and someone brings out a bunch of alcohol. Several kinds of beer, and a few bottles of some stronger stuff like vodka, tequila, and rum. I grab a beer, figuring I'm better off avoiding the stronger stuff. Especially since those bottles already seem open. I drink it as I mingle with some people, but someone turns on some music. It's impossible to hear anyone speak now, but that's fine. Everyone starts dancing instead. I take another beer and find Dilip. He's dancing and, maybe because of the beer, I feel confident enough to join him. I start dancing around him and he smiles at me. I down the rest of my beer and put the bottle on some table. Now, I really let go. Dilip matches my pace and next thing I know, he has his hands on me, but I don't mind. We start to dance together and the people around us make room. They watch as we go crazy. I've never been much of a dancer, so I follow his lead. A new song comes on and we get into it even more. When the song ends, we finally stop. I look into his eyes as he looks into mine. We both lean forward and I close my eyes. We begin to kiss. We keep going, fueled by alcohol and adrenaline until I finally realize what I'm doing. I stop and back away. He looks at me with great concern and says, "What's wrong?" "I-I don't know if I'm ready for this," I say, "I'm not even sure if I like guys." "Oh," Evan says, "I liked women as a woman. I kind of just assumed you liked men as a man." "Maybe I did," I say, "I'm not sure. I'm sorry." "Hey, hey," he says, "It's fine. I didn't mean to rush you." "I think I've drank too much," I say, "I'm gonna call it a day." "Okay," he says, "I understand. Take your time, but I really would like to see you again." "Me too," I say, "But next time let's do this sober." "Sure," he says. "Good bye," I say. "Good bye," he says, "I hope to see you again." I give him a little wave as I walk away. I find Mohit and tell her that I want to leave. She seems tired too so we leave this house. We go back to the hotel.
On the drive home in the morning Mohit gets a text from Priya, who had stayed at a friend's house last night. I guess she didn't want to stay at home with just Dad. The text asks us to pick her up so we swing by the friend's house and grab her. "So what happened?" Priya asks, "I saw online that some places had to bring in police to protect the people from the hateful mobs." "Luckily, we didn't run into anything like that," I say. Then, I briefly explain what happened with Melinda. "That's it?" Priya asks. "Well, Shruti left out all the parts involving that guy," Mohit says. "Guy, what guy?" Priya asks. This has really piqued her interest. "It's not a big deal," I say, "I met this guy named Dilip. He was affected too. He used to be a woman named Dimple." "They exchanged numbers," Mohit tells Priya. "Hey. We did more than just exchange numbers. We also kissed," I say. The words came out of my mouth before I had the chance to really think. "What?!" Priya screams. "You didn't tell me that," Mohit says. "Yeah, I wasn't sure I wanted to, but I've said it now," I say. "You kissed him?!" Priya shouts again. "Yes," I say. I explain how he caught me in his arms. How it made my heart flutter. How I fixed my makeup just for him, (Priya chimed in that she was proud of me when I said that), how we danced at the after party, and the subsequent kiss that I broke off because I wasn't sure what I wanted. "But we promised to see each other again," I say. "When will that be?" Priya asks. "I don't know," I say. "Well, you've got his number right?" Priya asks, "Just text him." "I've been thinking about that all morning, but I have no idea what to say," I tell her. My phone goes off. It's Dilip. He just asks me how I'm doing. "Oooh, was that him?" Priya asks. "Yes. he just wants to know how I'm doing," I say. I text back fine and ask how he is. He texts back, extremely hungover. I giggle a little when I see that. "What, what'd he say?" Priya asks. "Priya, calm down," Mohit says, "Just let Shruti handle it." Priya ignores Mohit and says, "If it made you laugh you should tell him that." I send him back a laughing crying emoji. He responds by calling me cruel, but it's obviously sarcasm. I ask him if he's home yet and he says yes. His sister drove him back this morning. I ask him if he is far from the place and says kind of. I say I'm a few hours away so I'm about to arrive home. He says he'll talk to me later. I respond and say I look forward to it. I put my phone down and Piper says, "You seem pretty happy." I didn't even realize it, but I have a stupid grin on my face.
At home, Dad is there and he asks about what happened. We tell him about the legal stuff, how I'll return to work in a couple weeks once everything checks out. We do not tell him about the 500000rs. We decided to keep that between us sisters and brother, as Dad would ask for some of it if he knew about it. Mohit and I have trouble saying no, so it's better if we say nothing. I spend the week at home, just chilling. Occasionally, Dilip and I text. They are always nice pleasant conversations. We get to know each other just a little bit more. We still haven't committed to anything, though. By Friday, I get a confirmation email. It tells me that they have confirmed my identity and I should receive the necessary documents in the mail soon. They also deposit the stipend in my bank account. When I tell my sister and brother, Priya says we should use the money to buy me a whole new wardrobe on the weekend. I don't know about all that, but I do need new clothes so I agree to it. On Saturday, we head out to our local mall. Dad usually spends his weekends out of the house with some of his buddies. As far as I can tell, they just drink all day and he often doesn't come home until Sunday. It's good for us. This way, we don't need to tell him what we're doing. He'd probably understand, but it's not worth getting into it with him. When we enter the mall, Priya seems very happy. Mohit and I follow her to a department store where she says, "Look at us. Two sisters all shopping. This will be fun," she looks downtrodden for a moment before saying, "It's too bad Mom couldn't be here." Mohit rubs her back and says, "I'm sure she's here in spirit." Piper shakes it off and her smile returns, "Yeah, you're right." From here, with Piper as our guide, we go on a huge shopping spree. After determining my sizes, she helps me not just buy practical outfits, but stylish ones too. I try on so many different kinds. Priya and Mohit help me decide which ones are good. Priya even gets Mohit to try on some things and convinces her to buy them. I ask Piper if she wants anything, but she likes the clothes she has now and is just happy to help us look good. By lunch, our arms are stuffed with bags full of clothing for me, and a couple for Priya. We drop off what we bought in the car before going back to the mall. We go to the food court to have lunch. During lunch, Priya asks me, "You make a decision about Dilip yet?" "Don't rush her," Mohit says. "It's fine," I say, "I do really want to see him again. When my paperwork arrives I'll probably ask him. Assuming his paperwork is also all good." After lunch, we head to a nail salon. I'm not sure what I want so Priya tells me to just get a simple french tip. She get a bit of actual color. Priya is so happy that we did this together that she wants to take a picture. She has the three of us pose by curling our fingers, mimicking the shape of claws. She only shows off one hand as she uses her other to take the picture. After taking it, she does something on her phone before showing it to us. I'm a bit embarrassed to see that she applied a filter to give us cat ears and whiskers, captioned it, These Kitties Have Claws, and posted it to her Instagram. She used a few hashtags, including sisters and brother. I don't mention my embarrassment and neither does Mohit, who I'm sure is slightly annoyed Priya didn't ask before posting it online. The reason Mohit doesn't say anything is probably the same as mine. Priya just seems so happy that neither of us want to ruin this for her. With that done, we head to a store to buy me my own makeup supplies. We also check out some purses and buy two that aren't cheap, but also aren't exorbitantly expensive. This way, I don't need to borrow any of Priya's. We also buy me several pairs of shoes. Some are heels and all are different styles. Priya points out that they'll fit her too and I say she is free to wear them anytime. Much to my embarrassment, we head to a Victoria's secret, "Priya, why are we here?" I ask. "If you're going to be serious with Evan you should really have some lingerie," she says. "I don't know if that's right Priya," Mohit says, "Besides it's not like you own any." "True, but you two are adults," she says, "You should both have some. Your repertoire can never be too full." "Repertoire?" I ask. "Yeah, the skills you use to get a guy to like you," she says, "Trust me. I've been on more dates than both of you combined." "I'm not sure that means anything," Mohit says, a bit annoyed. Priya notices her tone and says, "Well, maybe if you listened to me you'd get more dates." "I'm too busy working and taking care of the house to date," Mohit says back. "Right, sorry," she says, "I sometimes forget all you do for us." "It's okay," Mohit says, "And believe me. I'd love to find time to date." "I'm sure you will when I go to college, but enough about us," Piper says, "We're here for Shruti." Priya helps me pick out some lingerie and, we pick out a couple sets that look good. Before we buy them Priya walks over to a pair of tall purple heels. She grabs them, hands them to me, and says, "Every woman should own at least one pair of fuck-me pumps." "Priya!" Mohit scolds her. "What? It's not like I own a pair," she says before giving me a wink. I roll my eyes, but we buy the heels anyway. With all our shopping done, we head home.
I spend the next week at home again, but I still text Dilip often. On Saturday, all my paperwork finally arrives, including the therapist coupons. I'm not sure if I need them right now, so I just put them away for now. Mohit drives me to the DMV to get my new license. They give me a temporary paper one while I wait for the official one, so I can drive now. I text Dilip and he says he also got his and he asks if I want to get a coffee with him. I text him back yes and he tells me the place. Priya is ecstatic for me. She helps me coordinate a tasteful yet playful outfit. I'm wearing a black leggings, and a deep emerald top. It's slightly loose with a subtle V-neckline. Priya helps me with my makeup and I go for a simple look, just a small amount of mascara, eyeliner, and a light pink lipstick. I grab one of my new purses, put on two inch black heels, and order an uber. It turns out that we don't live all that far apart, Dilip and I. I haven't told him my address nor has he given me his, but he acted like this bar is a place he frequents. It's not too far from my house and if he is a regular he must live somewhere nearby. When I get there, I see that he is at a booth with some other people. He notices me and waves me over. "There you are! These are some of my friends." "Oh," I say. I had thought we'd be alone. This is fine though, if I think about it. This way, there isn't any pressure on either of us. Also, I've never been very good at making friends. All the ones I ever had I either lost contact with or I did a poor job maintaining the friendship. Maybe his friends could become my friends. So, we all start talking. I get to learn a bit about each of them and they learn a bit about me. Except really quickly, Dilip and I just start chatting. We drink a coffee and talk and it's like no one else in the world matters. The drinks keep flowing and on point Evan excuses himself to go to the bathroom. While he's gone one of his female friends says to me, "You and Dilip seem to really be hitting it off." "Yeah, I guess," I say. "I don't have to guess," she says, "I've known Dilip for a long time and I've only ever seen him act like this with his old girlfriends. Dimple or Dilip, he's still the same person. Though, I think he might like you more than he ever liked any of his old flames. There's a reason those never worked out." "What reason?" I ask. "They always fizzled out, but believe me when I say I see a spark between you that I've never seen Dilip have with anyone," she says. At that point Evan returns and we change the conversation. A couple coffees later and we're all ready to go home. Dilip and I promise to see each other again and I hope to see his friends again. I really enjoyed my time tonight. I get an uber back home. It's late, but it's not past midnight. I got to the restaurant pretty early. So, I'm not too surprised when I enter the house and find Dad is there watching TV with a juice in one hand. He looks over at me. "Where've you been?" he asks. "J-just out with some friends," I say. "You don't have friends," he says. "I do now," I say. "Couldn't get friends till he turned into a woman, some son I've got," he says before turning back to the TV. I don't respond. Instead, I just head upstairs. As I enter my room, Priya comes in behind me. She is angry, probably having heard what Dad said, "You can't let him treat you like that. In fact, we should both go downstairs and give him a piece of our minds." "No, Piper," I say, "You know he has a bad temper. You're not thinking this through. Who knows how he might react. Besides, we're lucky enough that he lets Mia and I still live here." Still in an angry tone Piper says, "Fine," she takes a deep breath before saying, "Changing the subject, how'd it go?" "His friends were there, but that was fine," I say, "They were really nice and I spent most of the evening talking to him. It was nice, there was no pressure that it was a normal date." "That's good," she says, "But when will you have your first real date?" "I'm not sure," I say, "I'm going to bed. Good night, Priya." "Good night, Shruti," she says.
***** My first day back at institute, I get there a little early so I can talk to my head. Manisha is a bit surprised to see my new appearance, but she is understanding. I tell her that I don't want special treatment, that the day should be treated as any other work day. When my coworkers arrive I briefly greet them, just so they are at least familiar with the new me. I notice Manisha going over to each one, probably to tell them to not make a big deal out of this. To work like normal. However, I notice people staring at me all day. Whether I'm in the break room, or in the class at my bench, or doing paperwork at desk. Everyone who passes by me stares. I realize that they must have questions. So, when the day ends, I gather my classmates I'm closest with. "I understand this must be strange," I say, "So, just this once, feel free to ask any questions." Rachel, a girl who's always had issues with boundaries, asks, "So, are you like, all girl, now?" She's also always been oblivious to this fact, so even though a few people give her a look, she earnestly looks to me for an answer. "Yes," I say, "I'm completely female." Rachel has only been here for a year and I had to spend a lot of time teaching her the ropes. "Did it hurt?" Isabel asks. She's my senior here and everyone calls her Izzy. I learned the ropes from her and I really respect her. "I was asleep for it," I explain. "So you just woke up in the morning as a woman?" Raina asks. She's our sassy intern. She and Rachel are good friends. "That's what happened," I say. "I would have been freaking out," Jessica says. She's the closest friend I have here even though she's only been here for a couple months. We're very like minded and she seems to really value my opinion. "I was more in a state of shock," I say. "But you're good now?" Gabrielle asks. Everyone calls her Gabi. Our lab is kind of big and we're split into groups. I'm room 1 with Raina, Isabel, Rachel, Jessica, and our boss is Mackenzie. Gabi is part of room 2. She started around the same time as Rachel and, although we're in different labs, she respects my seniority far more than the rest of her lab. I've always liked that. "I guess so," I say. "You seem to be taking it well enough," Mary says. Another member of room 2 and she's been here for several years. She's the only member of room 2 besides her boss who's been here longer than me. I like her calm demeanor. I've never seen her get angry or frustrated. "Yeah," I say, "After the initial shock, I got used to it." "That's good," Sirena says. She's the boss of room 2. Sometimes, when Mackenzie isn't here, she helps room 1. She often comes to me for advice as she doesn't know the inner workings of our lab very well. I've always liked how she comes to me over anyone else, even Izzy. She's been here even longer than Mary. She's one of the nicest people I've ever met. Our institute is very female dominant. I was the only guy in room 1 and there are a couple guys in room 2 and Lab Support, but I've never gotten along with them. All the girls really get along and I've always been jealous of their friendships. "I think that's probably enough," Manisha says. She's always been really nice to me. She calls me dependable and reliant. She's willing to leave certain tasks to me over other people as she knows I'll get them done right and accurately. I've always appreciated the trust she has in me. "Thanks for being so understanding," I say to them. "Of course." Manisha says. The others all chime in to say something similar. Then Manidha says, "Let's get outta here." We all say our goodbyes and that we'll see each other the next day. As I drive home, I can't help but feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I'll admit, I was nervous coming into work today. How would they react? Would they accept me as one of the girls? Would they treat me differently, not just from how they used to, but also different to how they treat other women? It's such a relief, that, in the end, except for a little staring, which is perfectly reasonable considering the situation, they've treated me the same. In fact, as the week goes on, I seem to really connect with them. In a way that I never did before. When I was a guy it always felt like there was at least some distance between them and me. Now that seems to be gone. Friday, as I leave work, Manisha says to me, "A bunch of us often do these girl's nights at restaurant. You want to come?" "Sure," I say. I try to play it cool, but I'm actually extremely excited to be invited. "Great," she tells me the name of the restaurant. I meet the other girls there after going home and changing into something more casual. When I enter the bar, I see them all sitting at two tables pushed together. I'm the last to arrive. They all have their drinks already so I go and order a beer before joining them. I sit down on the only empty chair. "There she is," Manishq says, "The woman of the hour." "What do you mean?" I ask. "We figured we should celebrate you becoming one of the girls," says Jessica. "Celebrate?" I ask. "Come on," Izzy says, already a little drunk, "We can all see how much happier you are. The little hums you do as you work. And I think I've seen you smile more this week than I had the entire time I've known you." She's right. I've been really happy, maybe happier than I've ever been. I feel confident for once. I look at my body in the mirror and I finally like what I see. Maybe this is something I always wanted. "You're right," I admit, "I am very happy now." "Then let's make a cheer," Sirena says, "To Shruti!" Everyone clinks their drinks and shouts, "To Shruti!" I blush, but it also feels nice, to be celebrated like this. We all start drinking, some of us more than others. I get a few cocktails in me after the mocktail and I find myself not thinking too hard about what I'm saying. That's how I end up telling them about Dilip. "But I'm not sure when our next date will be," I say. "Can we see a picture?" Raina asks. I look through my phone and realize I took one. I don't really remember taking it, but it's there. It must have been when we were at that bar. I show everyone, but Rachel grabs my phone to take a closer look. "He's hot," Jessica says. "Yeah, you should really make sure you don't let him get away," Gabi says. "Here's your phone," Rachel says. I take it from her and look at it. There is a text from me to Evan asking when our next date will be. I look up at Rachel and say, "You texted him?!" "What? You were the one who said that you wanted to go on another date," she says. "But I'm not prepared," I say, "I should text him and cancel." Izzy puts her arm around me and says, "Relash, Shhhruti." She is extremely drunk. "I'm sure it'll be fine." "No, I don't-" I'm cut off as a round of shots I brought over. One is handed to me and I down it without really thinking. Afterwards, I feel like there's something I'm forgetting. Something important that was really bothering me a second ago. Oh well, I'm sure I'll remember it eventually.
I wake up in my bed with a massive hangover. I'm not really even sure how I got home last night. My new girlfriends and I must have gone at it all night. I get up and go to the bathroom. While I'm on the toilet I check my phone and see a text from Evan. Shit! I finally remember the text Rachel sent. To Be Continued...
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